Therapy in St Paul -Stop the negative cycles in your relationships.
THERAPY FOR MEN AND THE CONFLICT-AVOIDANT
In-person and online
The ability to have difficult conversations with loved ones without withdrawing
or shutting down is a learned skill.
Schedule a free, 20-minute consultation.
Hi, I’m Reuben
I help men and conflict-avoidant individuals struggling with relationships and the depression and anxiety that results. My clients want successful, happy relationships but the fighting, constant tension and criticism leaves them feeling defeated. The small voice of self-doubt that once said, “Are you sure you can figure this out?” has snowballed into, “You are not enough.” I help my clients learn new skills for navigating conflict, build trust and intimacy in their relationships and communicate their wants and needs without resorting to old patterns.
THE PROBLEM
What It’s Like
In the Relationship
“I don’t know how it got here.”
“Things weren’t perfect but I didn’t think it was this bad.”
“I’ve been told not to ‘fix’ everything.”
“I just try to keep the situation calm.”
“I usually keep to myself and wait for things to blow over.”
“I’ve tried so hard but nothing seems to work.”
Within Yourself
“I feel numb.”
“I’m angry and I either explode or shutdown.”
“I get so afraid to do anything. Whatever I do will be wrong.”
“I go into a shell.”
“I can never get it right, so I just give up and be quiet.”
OVERCOME YOUR OBSTACLES
How Therapy Can Help
Know
Yourself
It makes sense that you respond to conflict by getting angry or shutting down. In childhood, those are two of the only options and most of us never learn new ways to cope.
Understand Your Partner
Many of my clients struggle to understand what their partner is asking of them or how to live up to their expectations. Getting a clearer picture of your partner’s experience unlocks natural growth.
Curb
Unhealthy Coping
Alcohol, porn, and screens are often used to numb when feeling angry or inadequate. Recognizing when those feelings appear will help you choose healthier options.
Repair
Relationships
Understanding yourself more, gaining insight into your partner and leaning into the hard conversations will rebuild the trust and intimacy the relationship once had.
HOW CAN I SUPPORT YOU?
What I Offer
Individual Therapy
Gain greater self-acceptance, better expression and management of emotions and improved quality of relationships.
Telehealth
Virtual appointments have made it easier to find high quality counseling services. Don’t let distance keep you from getting the support you need.
EMDR
Whatever trauma you have been through is not your fault. It may have been long ago or more recent. Either way there is a high probability it is impacting your relationships.
MORE RESOURCES
The Journal
You don’t need to figure this out alone.
Schedule a free, 20-minute consultation.