Rewire the Shutdown:
A Men's Relationship Group
A six-week live, virtual group for men ready to rewire their shutdown response, and stop the cycle of conflict in your relationship
Starts Tuesday, January 12, 2027
Actual Change, Not Just “Tips & Tricks”
Stop the cycle of shutting down, getting reactive, or saying what you think you're supposed to say just to keep the peace
Learn to communicate from a place of authentic self-awareness instead of relying on passive apologies that don't actually fix anything
Move from feeling like roommates to finding fun with your partner again
Led by Reuben Houser, MS, LPCC therapist who works with men on emotional availability and conflict patterns.
The Problem
When tension rises, you shut down. You might go quiet, avoid the conversation or freeze.
01.
The arguments seem to be about different things, like the kids' schedule, the dishwasher, or chores. Underneath, it's the same feelings every time: misunderstood, disconnected, perplexed.
02.
You've tried harder, apologized, and promised to do better, but the pattern still repeats.
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This isn't about effort or willingness. The problem is a shutdown response you haven't been taught to see.
04.
IT DOESN’T HAVE TO BE THIS WAY…
Rewiring the shutdown response is the fastest way to break the pattern
This isn't about memorizing the right things to say. It's about understanding what's going on inside you when things get tense. You'll start by noticing how you tend to show up in conflict. Then you'll map your Conflict Response Cycle (CRC), the chain of reactions that takes you from that first spark to shutting down.
From there, you'll build your own toolkit: simple, practical ways to calm your body, break the cycle, and stay steady over time. You're not learning what to say. You're learning how to stay in the room long enough to say anything at all.
You Will Learn to
Build a toolkit. Learn what to do in the moment to take care of yourself and stop the cycle.
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See your part in the cycle. Connect what’s happening inside yourself to what keeps happening in your relationship.
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Understand what’s happening inside. Recognize what’s underneath the shutdown, defensiveness, or urge to fix it.
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Find the words. Get language to explain to your partner what’s actually going on for you.
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The Transformation
Stop treating your partner's feelings as a problem you have to fix.
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Know how to calm yourself down without needing the conflict to end first.
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Recognize the familiar fight while it's happening, not three hours later.
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Become someone your partner can have a hard conversation with, rather than someone she has to figure out how to have a hard conversation around.
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This Is For You If
You're willing to look at yourself first to improve your relationship.
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When things get tense, you shut down, avoid, or change the subject.
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You're married or partnered, and you want to show up better in your relationship.
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You can commit to six Tuesday evenings and weekly homework.
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FAQ
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Nope. This is an educational group. It draws on Reuben's clinical training, but it isn't a substitute for individual, couples, or group therapy.
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No. This group is for you. The work starts with understanding your own patterns, which changes how you show up with your partner.
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If conflict at home leaves you going quiet, avoiding the conversation, or freezing, even when you want to stay engaged, this group is built for you.
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Live and virtual, for six Tuesdays at 6 PM Central, January 12 to February 16, 2027. Each session is 90 minutes.
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The 90-minute session plus a weekly homework assignment. Plan on around 45 to 60 minutes for homework.
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Sessions are not recorded, so plan to attend all six live.
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Each group has up to 10 men.
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Yes.
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Pricing will be shared with everyone on the interest list.
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You'll get a confirmation email, followed by updates about the group, including enrollment details before the cohort opens.
get started
The Process is Simple
You’ve already come so far.
BOOK
Grab a 30-minute time slot that works for you and you’ll get confirmation of the appointment.
MEET
We’ll talk over video about what been happening, what you want, and how I can support you.
BEGIN
If we sense it’s a fit, we will get you scheduled, and you’ll feel relief right away knowing you’ve already started your next chapter.
INTRODUCING
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